


Fever Dream

by Gameofscones



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: AU- Game of Thrones, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Arya Stark/Gendry Waters - Freeform, Depression, F/M, Game of Thrones - Freeform, Gendrya - Freeform, GoT, Modern AU, Modern Setting, Multichapter, Self Harm, TW for later chapters, gendry/arya
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-03
Updated: 2013-07-31
Packaged: 2017-12-13 20:02:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/828284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gameofscones/pseuds/Gameofscones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Modern AU in which Arya is a runaway, and is now 17 and living in London. She's depressed, so much so that she's taken a blade to her skin. Arya is completely alone; until she meets one person, someone who shakes the dust from the darkest places in her mind. His name is Gendry, and he has no family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cheap Beer and New Friends

 

Arya woke to the sound of her alarm buzzing obnoxiously. She rubbed her eyes, and threw her blanket off of her as she sat up. As she kicked her legs over the edge of her bed, the cold hard-wood floor pressed against her feet, giving her a momentary shock. Sucking in a sharp breath, she looked around her small flat. It was cramped, and smelled like curry from the restaurant next door. She hated it.

Arya stood up, and pulled her pajama top over her head, tossing it aside, her bottoms soon followed. She walked to her bathroom, which was literally like a short and narrow hallway with a shower and a toilet. It was cramped and spartan, but it worked well enough. Her hand grasped the shower curtain and pulled it to one side, as she stepped into the cold tub. The curtain closed, and Arya gripped the faucet, turning on the shower. A gasp escaped her lips as the cold water hit her face; it always took a moment to turn warm. The temperature of the water started to rise, and she began washing herself. As the water ran over her pale skin, she was hit with the realization that it was her birthday. Arya was turning seventeen today, and no one even knew.

Arya had been alone since she was twelve years old; after the death of her father, she ran away and found herself in the vast city of London. Sure, it took weeks of hitchhiking, and there had been plenty of close calls, but eventually she made it, and in one piece to boot. She hadn't seen her family since then, and most likely never would. She prefered it that way really, and to avoid sounding cheesy, she always sort of saw herself as a lone-wolf. Arya loved the solitute, the quiet. It was easier, and besides, Arya had always been quite thoughtful. Being alone gave her more time to be that way. 

Ten minutes passed and she turned the water off, grabbing the towel and drying her body quickly. She threw on the first thing she could find, which happened to be a dark gray t-shirt, a pair of jeans, and some worn out converse which used to be black, but had faded into a dull gray. Arya looked down at her arms, and found her fingers tracing the outlines of scars that had gathered over the years. Some were faded, and some were fresh, and all of them held secrets that Arya wouldn't dare share. Her thumb ran over ridged skin, and she let out a sigh. She grabbed a coat, threw it on, and walked out the door. 

 

* * *

 

She had a part-time job at a fast food chain. Making minimum wage hindered her ability to afford most basic necessities, but she made do with what she had. Besides, it was just her, and one person is fairly easy to take care of. But Arya had today off, so she walked. She had no real destination, she was just wandering. Arya just liked the adventure, even when it was a particularily boring day.  
Arya found herself standing outside of a seedy pub. It was a small building, made of orange-red bricks that were covered in dirt and stains. Arya had never been here before, but figured that since it was her birthday, she would try something new - besides, she usually looked old enough to get away with it. Seedy pubs didn't tend to give enough of a shit to ID their patrons, anyway. Her slender fingers wrapped around the door handle and pulled it open, striding inside. Looking around, she saw mostly middle-aged men with thick beards and ratty t-shirts, and younger men who wanted to have fun without spending much cash. She walked over to the bar, and ordered a beer.  
"ID," the man's deep voiced bellowed. The young girl took a step back, and her eyes widened. Arya almost choked with shock; usually bartenders thought she looked over eighteen, and she never had to show ID, which of course she didn't have, considering she just turned seventeen.  
"I, um--"  
"Hey, there you are!" A young man walked towards her, coming from behind and wrapping an arm around her waist. He looked no more than 21, with a care-free smile spread across his face. Arya froze, waiting to see what he was up to.  
Who is this asshole, she thought.  
"Gendry, is this your friend?" The bartender said, looking over to Arya and giving her a once-over before smiling knowingly, "you should have told me, love. Gendry's a regular 'ere. One beer coming up." 

Gendry... What kind of name is Gendry? 

The young man let Arya go and sat down on the bar stool next to her, smiling widely. As the bartender slid a glass of foamy beer towards Arya, she grabbed it, and gave the man a quick nod, before he stalked off into the back room. She looked over to Gendry.  
"Thanks," she said sheepishly, "I'm Arya."  
"Nice to meet you. I would say my name but you already know it." He smirked. "So, Arya, how come you're in the bar when you're underaged, then?" Gendry let out a chuckle as he asked her.  
"I'm not, I'm of age. I'm very legal!" Arya argued.  
"Come on, the way you froze up when he asked for your ID? Very mature."  
Arya said nothing in return, so Gendry continued, "Bill is a good man, but he's rather thick. I'm not as stupid as him, though, and I see right through you," his voice was teasing, and it annoyed Arya.  
"Okay. I'm seventeen. Today is my birthday," Arya admitted, looking to the ground with a bashful frown.  
"Is it? Well, happy birthday! why aren't you out celebrating with your family?" Gendry smiled again.  
Arya felt a lump in her throat, and she grabbed her beer, taking a big swig. Her lips pursed when she swallowed the foul tasting ale.  
"I don't have any family," She stated matter-of-factly. Her tone was cold, as if she were talking of someone else's experiences; it was like all feelings related to her family were blocked. The smile on Gendry's face dropped, and was replaced with an expression of sympathy. He looked at her, and she looked back at him, knowing that she just made the conversation uncomfortable. Then Gendry said something unexpected.  
"Me neither." He looked away for a moment, took a deep breath, and looked back to the young brunette.  
Arya stared into her half-full glass and tried to think of a reply. Her mind came up blank, she had never been in this situation, and she was usually horrible at emotional topics.  
"I'm sorry," she muttered. He smiled and thanked her. 

"So, why don't we celebrate your birthday then?" Gendry proposed, changing the subject. A grin flashed across the girl's face, and she let out a breathy laugh.  
"I just met you!" she exclaimed.  
"And? No one should spend their birthday alone." Gendry's voice was compassionate, and something in Arya clicked, What's the harm? Her eyes examined his face before she agreed, nodding her head.  
"Okay, let's go. Where are you taking me?" Arya asked teasingly.  
"It's a surprise," he said, slapping some bills down on the counter to pay for Arya's beer.  
Arya grabbed her glass, and downed the rest of its contents, before the two of them walked out of the pub and into the busy street.

 

* * *

After fifteen minutes of walking, Gendry had lead Arya to a tall but thin apartment building a few blocks away. The sides were strewn with graffiti, and the small back-alley lot on the left side fairly stank from the overfilled dumpster it housed. He pulled out a key, and unlocked the door. Arya felt uneasy about going into a stranger's house, but then again, she didn't mind a little risk-taking - and besides, there was something disarming about her new companion's smile. She followed after him, and when they got inside his suite, she couldn't help but smile. It was larger than her place, but it was still pretty small. Arya looked around, taking in the white painted walls, and the glossy hardwood floor. It was much cleaner than she expected, and it definitely smelled better than her place. 

"Drinks?" Gendry asked quizzically.  
"Sure. How old are you, anyways?" Arya asked.  
"20," Gendry replied as the two of them made their way to the kitchen. Gendry started rummaging through his cupboards. "So, we have... vodka, coconut rum, and..." he paused, looking deeper behind the bottles, "whiskey. That's it," Gendry offered.  
"Are you sure you want to give me alcohol?" Arya chuckled.  
"You don't have to take it if you don't want, but hey, it's your birthday," he smirked.  
"Do you have orange juice? We could make screwdrivers," Arya suggested, hopefully.  
"Spoken like a true seventeen year old. Screwdrivers it is." A deep laugh rumbled forth from Gendry's mouth, and Arya found that the sound of his laugh rang pleasantly in her ears. It was soft, and happy, and it was genuine. 

His hand snaked around the neck of a bottle of vodka, and Arya noted that Gendry's hands were big and rough. As he brought the vodka down to the counter, he asked her to pull a jug of orange juice out of his fridge. In short order the two of them were sipping their drinks - Arya had to admit she enjoyed 'dancing' around the cramped and small kitchen with her new 'friend' as the two of them made their drinks. Gendry chuckled at Arya's expression as he saw her take the first sip. It was obvious that she didn't like the taste of alcohol, but he expected as much from someone so young.

"Shut up," Arya said jokingly, catching the teasing gleam in his eyes. The two drank, and passed stories back and forth, with witty banter filling the spaces between, and Arya began finding Gendry quite interesting. He was also adventurous, like her, and messy, also like her, and he liked similar music. Not to mention, he was extremely handsome; tall, with high cheekbones and a dusting of stubble. His hair was cut short, and a little uneven on the right side, like he had buzzed it himself, but she found that the asymmetry suited him. His body was muscular without being bulky, and Arya had her work cut out for her in trying to cover up her stares.  
Gendry was also funny, from the short time that they had spent together Arya could tell that he had a very teasing sense of humour. She liked it.

"So, what do you want to do, birthday girl? We can watch movies, we can play some music, we can just talk. It's really your call," Gendry asked.  
"Oh, um, I don't know," she said, indecisively peering into her empty glass.  
"I wish I had more things to offer, but I'm kind of a shit party-planner. Not to mention the short notice," he winked at her playfully.  
Arya laughed, and then smiled at Gendry.  
"Really, this is more than enough. Thank you," She said. She never really had someone try to celebrate her before, and it felt really good.  
"My pleasure."

The next hour and a half was spent flirting back and forth, and sipping on cocktails. Discussing opinions, and talking about different interests. For such a short period of time, they had both learned a great deal about eachother. Arya wasn't usually so open, people didn't usually know much about her at all, but there was something about Gendry that made her comfortable. Something that made her want to talk. 

Gendry looked down at his watch, "It's getting late," he mentioned. Arya looked over, and said, "if you want I can go."  
"Well, do you want to go? Because..." he paused, "I wouldn't mind if you stayed."  
Arya smiled.  
"Wouldn't it be sort of bad for me to sleep over at a guys house, a guy who I just met?" she teased, and Gendry just laughed.

 

* * *

 

The clock's small hand had moved over the 1 by the time Arya's eyes fell heavy. She rubbed them, trying to perk herself up, but it had been a long day, and she was tired. She let out a yawn, and Gendry snickered at her. He thought she was cute, with her short brown hair, and boyish clothes, and her big eyes. He especially liked her attitude; it was spunky, and he thought it was refreshing. 

"You wanna go to bed?" Gendry asked, and Arya nodded.  
"Yeah, me too. I've got a t-shirt you can sleep in if you'd like," he offered,  
"Okay, thanks," Arya smiled. He handed her the large, plain white shirt, and she sauntered into the bathroom. 

When Arya came out, she was wearing nothing but the shirt, and her underwear. Gendry felt his cheeks flush, and he tried to look at something - anything else.  
"It's not like I'm naked, Jesus," Arya proclaimed. The thought of him blushing at the site of her scantily clad made Arya smirk. She walked over to him, and as she stepped out of the shadow of the bathroom, Gendry noticed something. There were pale ladders of scars running all along her arms. Gendry's eyebrows furrowed as he looked at them, and then he looked at up at Arya. She was oblivious to him noticing, maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was her comfort, but she had forgotten about them all together. 

When she realized that he noticed, Arya pulled her arms behind her, in an attempt to hide them.  
Gendry motioned with his head for her to come closer to him. No words were spoken about the scars, and no questions were asked, Gendry just tried to pretend that they weren't there. Not because he didn't care, but because he didn't want her to feel uncomfortable. So he acted like it wasn't real, and he got her some blankets. Arya took his single-sized bed, and he slept on the floor, like a gentleman. Not soon after, the two had fallen into a deep slumber. 

 

* * *

 

Over the next month, Arya and Gendry had become inseperable. They spent time together whenever it was possible, going to movies, walking around town, drinking at the local pub (where Gendry would buy alcohol for her and no one ever questioned it). The two enjoyed each other's company. Arya learned that Gendry was a mechanic; he worked at a local garage 5 days out of the week. Sometimes, Arya would visit him during breaks. Sometimes she would bring food, but not always, and they would lean on the hood of cars and talk. 

Gendry's shift for the day was almost over, and Arya had come to pick him up. They were going to head down to the pub after work, and Arya was waiting patiently. The garage smelled like gasoline, and sweat, and metal. It was dirty, and when the sun shone in you could see the dust particles floating everywhere. Gendry wore navy blue overalls. He wore a light gray wife-beater underneath, and he tied the top half of his uniform around his waist. Arya watched the sweat bead down Gendry's forehead as he worked.

He put his tools away as he finished up, and wiped his hand on a old, stained rag that hung from his back pocket, which really didn't help to clean up considering it was dirtier than his hands were. A change of clothes followed, and they both headed out to his car. Gendry drove them both to the pub, and when they arrived they stepped out eagerly. Once inside, they saw that it was loud and packed. Some sport was playing on the TV, which Arya couldn't care less about, but it seemed to bring in quite a crowd. They started over to the bar, and Bill, the bartender, got them the usual: Two pints of cheap beer. They talked, laughed, and drank, and a few hours had passed before they even realized it. Night had fallen over the city, and Gendry suggested that they leave. The two grabbed their coats, and waved Bill goodbye, before walking out. Crisp summer night air hit the two of them, and Arya leaned up against the wall of the building. A deep breath of cool air filled her lungs, and she sighed it out with content. Gendry leaned next to her. 

"Gendry," Arya started.  
"Yeah?"  
Arya bit her lip. Her head was swimming from one-to-many beers, and without thinking, she turned to Gendry and pressed her lips against his. It was sloppy, and wet, and a little bit aggressive when she kissed him. When she pulled away, she felt a pang of embarrassment in her chest. Abruptly, Arya turned and tried to walk away, but large hands gripped her small shoulder and spun her around. She faced Gendry, and mumbled that she was sorry, so sorry, and that she shouldn't have done that because he could do so much better than her. 

Gendry fell silent, listening to the younger girl babble. 

Arya was always the boyish one, not like Sansa, her sister. Sansa was beautiful, and lady-like, and Arya just simply wasn't. She wasn't what men found attractive, and she was almost always overlooked.  
"Arya, I..." Gendry didn't know what to say.

Arya's thoughts were in a flury of confusion, and without another word, she walked away. Gendry didn't follow her, he just stood and watched, and part of Arya wanted him to follow her, to tell her that he felt the same way, but Gendry was still, his eyes fixed on her figure as she stalked off.

 

  
* * *

Two weeks had passed, two painfully dull weeks, and Arya was restless. She lay on her bed, headphones in, listening to music. The kiss played over in her head, as if on repeat. Maybe if I just waited, if I hadn't been so abrubt. Or maybe I should have not kissed him at all, ever.  
Her phone vibrated and the buzzing noise cut through her music and her thoughts. She pulled out the headphones and grabbed her cell, looking at the screen. It was Gendry, again. He had been calling, and texting her for the entirety of the two weeks they spent apart, but Arya was too embarrassed to answer. She was trying to cut him out of her life, thinking it was for the best-- or at the very least it was easier than fixing this mess she created. She hit the end button, stopping the vibration.  
Five minutes later, she got a text: 

"Arya just talk to me, please."  
Her fingers fumbled over the keys reluctantly.  
"No."

An hour later, there was a loud rapping on her door. The sudden noise startled her, and she stood up quickly, walking towards the door. Without thinking, she swung the door open, only to stare dumbly out at Gendry, who stood silently in front of her. He scratched the back of his head, and as he opened his mouth to speak, she tried to close the door. His hand shot out faster than she could move, however, and he threw the door open, causing it to thud against the wall. Without missing a beat, Gendry walked in to Arya's apartment and made his way to the middle of the kitchen as Arya stood there, still in shock. He turned to her, and stared her in the eye, which she tried to avoid by looking to her feet, but Gendry had had enough. It was just a fucking kiss, what does she think I'm gonna say? he thought, annoyed by her avoidance. 

Arya looked up at Gendry, who hadn't broke his stare. "What?" Arya snapped.

"What's going on with us?" Gendry asked. Arya didn't answer, and Gendry shook his head. "Just tell me what's going on!" His voice was getting louder, building into a stifled yell. Arya had to hold in a slight smile; she had never seen Gendry get mad before, and it was kind of amusing the way his nostrils flared out. 

"I'm just sorry, okay? I think it would be better if I just left you alone, you could focus on the Garage, and-"  
"I don't want you to leave me alone!" Gendry snapped at her, "I've been alone all my life."  
"Gendry, that's not what I meant- I just..." She paused, "I just think that I went too far, I mean, I'm seventeen, and you're twenty for god's sake! I was out of line..."  
Gendry waited for Arya to finish.  
"I'm just embarrassed." Her voice was subtle, as if she was hoping he wouldn't hear her. The expression on his face said otherwise.  
"Oh, okay. You're embarrassed, so you cut me out of your life all together?" Gendry retorted sarcastically. Arya bit her lip with frustration, and Gendry made his way towards the petite brunette slowly. He shrugged, and said, "Look, I know you're a little younger than me, but it's only three years. Arya, since you came around, things have gotten a lot better for me. I mean... What I mean to say is--" Gendry didn't really know where he was going with this, all he knew was the way he felt when she was around. 

"Just, don't go, okay?" He pleaded. 

Arya flashed a small smile, and punched him in the arm lightly. He smiled back at her, and let out a chuckle. There was a moment of silence, as the two took in their re-union, and then Arya's smile faded as she began to think about what Gendry said. I've been alone all my life, his words echoed in her head. 

"Gendry, what did you mean when you said you've always been alone?" She asked naively, Gendry took a deep breath before answering.  
"Well," he said, smiling faintly, "I've never really had a family," he stated matter-of-factly. They shared a moment of understanding.  
"Oh." Her voice was soft and thoughtful. "I can be your family," Arya muttered quietly. As soon as the words escaped her lips she wished she could reel them back in.

Part of her didn't want to admit that she wanted someone to be close to, someone to care for. But the other part of her looked at Gendry, and for that moment felt something unrecognizable; love. Gendry walked towards her, towering over the short brunette; he placed his hands on either side of her face, and pressed his lips softly on hers. When their lips parted, he gently brushed the hair from her face. 

Gendry smiled, "You wouldn't be my family, Arya. You'd be more than that."

Arya thought this was his way of saying he loved her, her not-so-pretty parts and all. She figured that this was Gendry's way of telling her that when he fell asleep he would find himself thinking about her eyes, and Arya liked that; and even though she'd never admit it, Arya thought about Gendry more often than she perhaps should. 

Arya shook her head lightly, and a half-smile spread on her face. "Gendry..." she paused, and bit her lip, waiting for the right words to form on her tongue, "I-" 

Arya stopped. She was always terrible at saying how she felt. Her eyes dropped to the floor, and Gendry stood waiting for her to look up at him. She didn't, she just stared at her feet and tried to hold back the tears that were stinging her eyes. Gendry tilted Arya's chin up with his index finger. Gendry's face glowed with his familiar smile, and Arya let out a small, breathy laugh, one of embarrassment, as she wiped her eyes.

Arya couldn't stand the way that Gendry smiled at her. His eyes would glimmer, and his cheeks would form small dimples, and it made her feel so happy, and so safe-- so vulnerable. Arya was usually surrounded by a wall, one that she had built up ages ago to keep out all of the pain that she'd endured in her lifetime, and ever since Gendry came into her life, he'd been slowly tearing that wall down. 

Stupid, Arya thought.

Gendry then pulled her into his chest, and hugged her tightly. It took Arya a moment to reciprocate, but eventually she wrapped her small arms around him, and tilted her head against him. Gendry buried his face in her hair, smelling her. She smelled like shampoo, and freshly picked strawberries, and Arya.


	2. Family Ties

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gendry finds out the truth about Arya's past.

  
Arya's chesnut hair snone in the sunlight. Her thin body sat by her window, gazing into the streets. It was one of those days, one of those bad days; Arya had these quite often, probably more than a healthy person should. Her soft index finger traced the outline of one of her many scars. It was risen, and tender, and a bright shade of pink. She winced as the memory of a blade dragging across that spot flashed back to her. A deep breath filled her lungs and she let out a defeated sigh.  
  
She stared blankly out of her window, and a young girl walked passed. She had long, orange hair, and she was tall and pale, and Arya's eyes widened. She looked closer, and despite how ridiculous the thought was, for an instant she swore it was Sansa, her older sister. Part of her wished so deeply that it had been Sansa, walking around London, trying to find her sister.  
  
Sister, Arya thought, scoffing. I haven't been her sister in a long time. They've all probably forgotten me by now. Her mind drifted. Thoughts, memories, and images of the people she once called family, and the place she used to call home, snuck their way into her head often. Back then, before she went to bed at night, Arya used to think of the stories her mother would share. Stories of religion, of Gods and protection. But that was before her father was ripped from the world years too early.  
Now Arya only thought of one "God." The only higher power that Arya trusted, the only one that proved to be real time and time again: Death.  
She thought of death often, of her father's death, mostly, but sometimes Arya would image what it would be like for her to succumb to the darkness. She imaged it would be peaceful, at least more peaceful than where she was now. Sometimes, when she was alone in the vast crowds of people that filled the streets, Arya would think of swallowing a bottle of pills, or jumping into the traffic-filled road. She never planned on trying anything, not really, she just thought about it.  
  
Arya's hand reached for the curtain, closing it along with the rest of the world.  
  
  
* * *  
  
 _It was dark, and bitterly cold. Arya's teeth chattered against eachother as snow flurried around her. She had no shoes on, but she was walking in deep snow. With each step, she felt the burning sting of the cold on the bottoms of her feet. She shuddered and rubbed her hands over her upper arms, trying to warm herself up._  
 _She was awfully confused, and had no idea how she managed to end up in the middle of nowhere during winter, but she didnt question it deeply. Instead, she just kept walking, amongst rows of frost-bitten trees that stood bare and frail._  
  
 ** _Snap._**  
  
 _Arya jolted, turning around to see what was behind her. Her eyes were wide and wary, and she searched the shadows that were cast from the tall trees. Shrugging her shoulders, she turned back around and continued walking forth._  
 _'Where am I?' She pondered, looking all around her._  
  
 ** _Snap. Crack._**  
  
 _It sounded like a twig breaking in two. There was someone - something there. Arya could feel her heartbeat quicken, pounding against her chest. She walked faster, and her breath got heavy and shallow. The wind whistled through the trees, and it sounded as if it were saying something. Arya couldn't make out the words, but it surely wasn't a welcoming sound. Her feet started pounding into the snow as she picked up into a run. Her hair flowed behind her head, dancing with the wind as she ran. She started to tear up with fear and frustration._  
  
 _A long, shadowy figure snaked through the tall trees, catching Arya's eye. She stopped in her tracks, and her breath was visible as it met with the harsh, cool air. Her eyes scoured the forest, but she couldn't fing anything. Then, the figure flashed before her again, and in a second it was gone, hidden along the rows of tall trunks. She walked slowly, trying to sneak away. Her feet took her to the closest tree, and her fingers ran over the bark. It was damp and she felt the dirt sticking on the pads of her fingers._  
  
 ** _Swish_**  
  
 _It flashed behind her, and then around her, to the other side of the tree. She saw nothing. She walked further into the depths of the dark forest, and as she passed the tree, the shadow followed her. The hairs on the back of the young girl's neck stood at attention, and a shiver shot through her spine. Without time to react, there were charcoal black fingers curling around her shoulders, and she jerked away, turning abruptly to face the creature._  
  
 _It had no face. It was just... darkness._  
  
 _Arya took in a sharp gasp and backed her feet away, but before she could go anywhere, her back thudded against something solid. A tree was blocking her steatlhy exit, and she felt her heart fall through her stomach._  
  
 _"Please..." Arya was never one to beg. She was a fighter, and most things seldom scared her. But this... thing, this thing frightened her more than words could describe. Tears welled in her eyes and spilled over, sliding down her cold cheeks. The figure moved towards her, and she froze in place. Its long, spider-like fingers wrapped tightly around the girls neck, and she let out a stifled scream. Arya began choking, coughing, anything to try and breathe again. Her arms flailed towards the shadow, trying to bat it away, but they fell right through the things body, as if it were smoke, or a cloud. She whimpered, and the shadow moved even closer to her. Its body enveloped her, taking her entire body into itself. She was surrounded by blackness, and she wanted to scream but she couldnt. She wanted to run, but she couldnt. She was stuck. Pain filled her lungs as she suffocated slowly. Her eyes burned red, and her skin began to crack, peeling off of her. The pain was unimaginable, and she began to disinegrate, becoming one with the shadow--_  
  
Arya shot up, sitting in her bed. Her body was covered in a cool, clammy sweat, and she took in quick, shallow breaths as she looked around her room. Regular wallpaper, regular temperature, regular skin. There were no trees, no shadow. She stood up and ran towards the end of her room, flicking on the light. Brightness surrounded her, and she squeezed her eyes shut at the shocking change in brightness. She took a few deep breaths, bending over and balancing her hands on her knees.  
I'm safe, She thought, relieved.  
  
I would love to tell you that this experience was a first, but I would be lying. Arya had been having these nightmares for years. On nights like these, she would be taken into a world so horrific that it threatened to blead into reality. She walked back towards her bed, and lay under the covers. The next hours were spend tossing and turning, unable to sleep.  
  
Morning shot through the windows, the brightness hitting her face. She rubbed her eyes, and got out of bed.  
  
The long night had taken a toll on her. She thought of her father, and a pang of guilt shot through her chest. When the memory of the loss that she endured came back to her in the past, she had always felt betrayed. Betrayed because he left her, he left her alone and she hated him for it.  
Now she just felt guilty, because she knew that she couldn't blame him for dying, it's not like he chose to go. But she did. She walked out on her family, she did that.  
  
Arya wondered if they ever missed her, if they even cared. She shook her head lightly, biting at her lower lip. Her eyes glanced down at her scars, and she paused for a moment, thinking deeply on what to do next.  
  
She reached for her night stand, opening the drawer and pulling out a small razor. Her heart started pounding in her chest, and she sat on her bed. She pulled her arm out in front of her, and pressed the razor to her skin hesitantly. She dug it in deeper, dragging it horizontally. Blood began to form beads where the skin had separated. She felt a wave of relief wash over her, a slightly dizzy calm. Her eyes rolled back before shutting them tightly. A thin, crooked smile spread on her lips.  
Blood dripped down her wrist, and a small drop hit her sheets.  
  
Shit, Arya thought, before getting up and running to the bathroom. She stuck her arm under the sink faucet, turning it on. A stream of water met her skin, causing her to gasp at the cold. The water mixed with the deep crimson on her arm, washing it away. The sink filled with cloudy, red water.  
  
  
*******  
  
Months had passed, and it seemed that every few nights Arya would delve into terror-filled dream worlds. She would wake up in cold sweats, diving for the phone,  
her fingers fumbling over the keys. Gendry would almost always pick up, no matter how late it was. She liked that about him. He knew about her nightmares, not about the content, simply just that she had them. He didn't pry, Arya liked that too. She had so many secrets hidden, so many lies about her past built up, that if he did pry she wouldn't even know how to tell the truth.  
  
Arya's birthday was coming up. Gendry had been in her life for a year now, one bitterly sweet year. Of course he was the sweet part, the bitter part was her own. _Eighteen years old,_ she thought, _and none the wiser._ Arya smiled to herself. She pulled out her phone, texting Gendry to come over. She had a lot to tell him. A week ago she had quit her job, she figured it was time to get away from the greasy food and cranky customers. She wanted to be free. Gendry didn't know, though, she wanted to wait for the right time to tell him. Soon after, there was a hard knock on her door. She let Gendry in, and they sat down on her couch.  
  
"So, Gendry I have something to tell you," Arya started, she looked over at the young man sitting next to her. He was smiling, his eyes catching the light and glimmering. It made her blush slightly. She looked down, trying to fight the flushing of her cheeks. "Go on," Gendry prodded, chuckling at her sudden long pause.  
"Right, um, I did something that I'm really happy about. You might not like it though," Arya continued, obviously avoiding the news she had.  
"Fuckin' tell me, Christ you're makin' me sweat Arya!" Gendry exclaimed, teasingly.  
"Gendry I quit my job," Arya stated. She looked at her hands, twidling her thumbs nervously as she waited for his response. When she looked back to his face, he was smiling. His classic Gendry smile. She felt instant relief that he at least wasn't angry or disappointed. Then she felt the weight of muscular arms wrapping around her thin frame, squeezing her tightly. She laughed at the sudden contact.  
"I'm so glad, Arya, really. That job was shit. Now you can do something that, you know, makes you happy," he said, letting go of her.  
"Yeah, me too. I hated it there, you know," she added.  
"Yeah, I know." Gendry tilted her head towards him, their eyes meeting. "I love you," he told her seriously.  
"I love you too," she replied, laughing at his intensity. He was passionate, she'd give him that. But Arya was never good at expressing herself seriously, she simply made light of any situation she could, it was easier to laugh.  
A few hours passed as if they were minutes. The two spent the time kissing, talking, passing back witty banter and silly jabs at each other. Eventually it crossed Gendry's mind that Arya's eighteenth birthday was soon approaching. He wanted to impress her with a surprise party. He longed for the look on her face as she realised how many people truly loved her. He knew that she had to have some family. Whenever he brought it up she dismissed him frustratedly. But he was prepared for persistance, he was stubborn and bull-headed.  
"Arya, I have a question," he started, his voice subdued as to not seem confrontational.  
"Yeah?" She waited for him to ask his question, not expecting the blow about to hit her.  
"Can you... Tell me about your family?" He was more timid now than he had ever been. He knew it was a sore subject, but soreness wouldn't last forever, he figured. Arya's face contorted into a mixture of anger and sadness as the question fell upon her. She shook her head lightly, letting out a sigh. She was sick of fighting the topic, she thought that he would give up but he was more stubborn than she was, which amazed even her. _I'll just tell him,_ she reasoned with herself, _But what if he thinks I'm horrible..._ She weight the consequenses. _Then again honesty is the most important part of a relationship, right? Or at least that's what I've heard._ Her thoughts were a flurry, reminding her of home in the winter, of the snowflakes dancing in the wind, landing on her tongue only to melt. He was her home now, he deserved to know.  
"Fine, I'll tell you," she agreed, looking down at her hands. She lifted her thumb to her mouth, anxiously nibbling at her already short finger nail. "I, um... Where do you want me to start?"  
"What were they like," he replied quickly, as if the question had been on his tongue, threatening to spill over for this whole time.  
"Wow, that's sort of a loaded question," she started, trying to lighten the mood. "Well it's a big family, four brothers and one sister. Rickon, he's the youngest. He follows Jon around like a puppy, or he used to before Jon went to the Navy. Bran, he's sweet. He was in an accident a long time ago, paralyzed from the legs down. Better than dying, I guess... Robb is the oldest, he's, um," she paused, trying to gather the words. "He's _strong._ Jon's my favourite though, he's my best friend, really. _Was,_ he _was_ my best friend." Arya inhaled a deep breath of air before continuing on. No one knew this side of her. Before Gendry she was faceless, she was no one. Just another girl in London. He changed that, gave some meaning to her existance. She loved him for that, but at the same time she hated him for it, because it's easier when you've got nothing. When you have nothing it means you have nothing left to lose. "He's not really my brother, I mean I guess not. I mean... He's my half brother. Not a Stark, technically, but he is to me. A Stark, that is." Gendry listened intently, watching her face as she told her story. He had been waiting ages to know these things, to figure out the mysterious girl he met in a bar.  
"Then there's Sansa... Jesus where do I even start. She was a major pain in my ass. All girly and shit, but I love her. Typical sister I suppose. Mom and Dad-" Arya haulted to a stop when she mentioned her father. For a brief moment she had forgotten. Her teeth clamped down on her lower lip and her eyes squeezed shut, trying to hold back the tears welling in her eyes. She turned her head away from Gendry. "That's basically all there is to the story. I'm gonna go take a shower," Arya stood to her feet, making her way to the bathroom. Gendry followed, grabbing her wrist and pulling her back. His thumb accidentally ran over the risen scars on her arm, and he let go with a sudden gasp. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to," Gendry fumbled over his words. Arya just shook her head and locked the bathroom door behind her. She slid to the ground, meeting the cold linoleum on her legs. Her fingers ran over the spot that had so abruptly scared Gendry. She let a tear roll down her cheek before wiping it and splashing some water on her face, forcing herself to gather herself.  
  
Gendry left Arya to herself, he knew she needed some space. He pulled his laptop out and opened up the search engine. His fingers clicked fastly over the keys, typing in the Stark name to the search. When he pressed enter something heartbreaking popped up.  
  
 _Eddard Stark: Obituary Page._  
  
He clicked on the link hesitantly, reading over the words on the screen. Pain bolted through his chest as he thought of the pain she must have gone through. He searched in the other names that Arya mentioned. No obituary pages, no missing persons, they were all... _Alive?_ Gendry was terribly confused. As he scrolled down he found a news clipping from years ago. It was an old missing persons report, a closed case on Arya Stark. Gendry sat back in his chair, his head hitting the backing. He inhaled sharply as he pieced together the information.  
  
Arya left. She didn't 'have no family' like she insisted on the day they first met. She had a whole family waiting for her. Loving her endlessly, worried sick. Despite his sympathy, and his care for Arya, when he found out that she ran from her _family,_ it sent a jolt of lightning through his stomach. He wanted to scream at her, to hit her even. His mouth pursed tightly. He would kill for the chance to know his family, to know who his father was. To hear their voices, or see their faces, or even just know their names. He desperately wished for this every time he saw the stars glimmer in the sky, or blew out a birthday candle, and every night before bed until he turned seventeen. _Arya just threw them away like trash,_ he thought furiously. He wanted to confront her, but instead scoured the internet, searching for a way to contact a Stark. He found Sansa's facebook page, her cellphone number posted in her "about" section. He picked up his phone, checking to see that Arya was still in the bathroom before dialing the number.  
  
It rang and he felt the anticipation build up in his throat. "Hello," a feminine voice answered. He didn't say anything for a moment, just took in the sound of her voice, feeling guilty for calling her in the first place. _This is the right thing to do,_ he reassured himself.  
"Hello? Is anyone there?" Sansa's voice sounded confused.  
"Oh, um, hello. Is this... Sansa?" Gendry asked. "Sansa Stark?" he finished. There was a long pause before she replied.  
"Who is this?"  
"It's Gendry Waters. I'm um, is Arya Stark your sister?" He was horrible at saying the right thing, he had no timing skills at all. Another pause.  
"Is this a fucking joke?" Sansa replied angrily. She seemed less ladylike than Arya described her to be.  
"No, I'm her boyfriend. I'm trying to get her in touch with some family. She lied to me and told me that she had none, but I found you. I mean, online, I found you online, and I had to give it a shot," Gendry rambled on, hoping not to make an ass out of himself. He heard her voice making a strange squeeking noise, like she was starting to cry. Shit. He heard her take a deep breath, collecting herself as best she could.  
"Is this for real, Gendry?" She said his name like it was some mythical creature that she didn't believe in.  
"Yeah, s'real."  
"Oh my god..." Sansa let out, relieved. All of her fears and questions had been at least somewhat answered. "Where are you?" Gendry proceeded to tell her he City and street he lived on. She told him to expect a visit in a few days. Guilt washed over him as he hung up. He brought the phone to his chin, holding it there as he let out a deep sigh. He wouldn't tell Arya about this, he couldn't. She's be furious. He could already visualise steam coming from her ears.  
  
Gendry heard the door open, and he quickly tossed his phone to his side. Arya walked out, her eyes swollen from her tears. She didn't talk to him for the rest of the night. But by midnight, Gendry had crawled into bed next to her, his arm wrapping around her like a blanket. His face was buried in the nape of her neck, and ke kissed her softly there. Then she fell asleep slept, her breath deep and slow, and Gendry was riddled with guilt and shame. _This is for the best,_ he thought, trying to convince himself as he drifted in and out of consciousness.  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry for not updating for a while. Temporarily lost my muse, however it is back and I hope you enjoyed this chapter. There are more to come. Thanks for reading and please give me feedback!

**Author's Note:**

> I will be writing another few chapters! Comment and tell me what you though, or if you have any suggestions on where I should take this fic! Any feedback is appreciated.


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